$%#@%@s Want To Die
Feel free to add whichever word you feel is appropriate in the title.
I came to a startling conclusion on the way home today: it’s not me.
I’ve been under the impression all week that I was just pissed off and bitter with life and people because Jolene is in Africa. And yes, I am pissed off and bitter about that, however that is only a small part.
I was assuming that the events which were unfolding in my life were because I was upset.
- The parents who were posted up in the office as if they were going to fight me. (Literally)
- The student who suddenly won’t SHUT THE HELL UP in class
- The teacher who is talking $hit about me to his students during class
- The former principal, who is evil, and was fired, coming in the building to yell at one of my kids.
- The morons who don’t study and then fail
- The piss poor student presentation that took place today, with an even worse excuse.
Then it hit me: no. Those things were not caused by me being bitter. They were caused by stupid people.
Yes, how I choose to respond to them is at issue, with all love, grace, mercy, turning of cheeks, meekness, baseball bats, or screaming. My reaction to said events is ALL about me, and my bitterness might come into play then, but the events themselves, no.
This was a large weight off the shoulders.
Thankfully I have good students and co-workers who keep me grounded.
. . . And help me plan my various forms of payback.
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You know, I often wonder if I am actually more intelligent than the “stupid people” or if the stupid people just think differently than I do and therefore find me stupid. Some days, I really lean towards the “more intelligent” side, even though that just doesn’t make any sense seeing as how I’m just not that smart.
Anyway. Random musing. It honestly is something that I wonder about regularly. And having friends tell me that I’m smart doesn’t help because I figured that we’re friends for a reason. We probably think similarly. So it’s the people who don’t get me whose opinions I’d really like to know.
… and maybe we should all take IQ tests while we’re at it …